Nice spin on this one

I once watched a video of  Steven Covey show you how to prioritize your day by taking an ice bucket filled with small rocks and having a person try to fit in the big rocks. This video and the exercise that we performed following has always left an impression on me and this new video has an interesting twist that takes you out of the boardroom and really shows the even bigger picture in life.  I hope you enjoy it!


http://play.simpletruths.com/movie/the-empty-pickle-jar/?cm_mmc=CheetahMail-_FR-_-08.10.12-_-PickleJarMovie&utm_source=CheetahMail&utm_campaign=PickleJarMovie

Why is it that sometimes you find your self stuck?

We have all been there at some point in our lives when you hit a roadblock of some sort or you get caught up in a "rut". Some of us actually walk around with limiting beliefs saying things like "I can never do that", "I will never lose this weight" or "I could never earn that kind of money". All too many of us just cant step outside of our comfort zone to achieve our goals. Why is that?

Let me introduce you to the subconscious world-  Homeostasis. The subconscious physiological process of maintaining a stable physical state of equilibrium regardless of varying external conditions. In other words the state of being in our comfort zone.Think about when you have had to speak in front of a group and you notice physical changes in your body for example, sweaty palms, butterfly's in your stomach etc. These are reactions to our bodies fight or flight mechanism. Which I think is a great analogy to what we do to our selves when we are working towards any kind of a goal. Some of us choose to fight and some of us choose  flight or flee. When we flee the situation we stay in our "rut" we give in to those limiting beliefs and we remain stuck. However when we choose to fight through our comfort zone we manage the subconscious stress associated with change and we achieve our goal. We grow!

So how do you fight through your comfort zone? Consider the conscious versus the subconscious or real versus imagined. I encourage you to check out a book by Dr. Maxwell maltz who wrote Pscho-Cybernetics. In it he states:
"Change occurs not by intellect, and not by intelligence; change is brought about by experience. Remember, experiencing is the same to the subconscious mind as imagining. The subconscious mind does not know the difference between real and unreal. It accepts what you feed it".

 So start feeding your mind with unlimited beliefs. "I can do it" "I will lose the weight" "I can earn that kind of money". With that going for you the opportunities our boundless! 

The ability to demonstrate positive communication techniques

One of the most important skills for any leader to excel at is communication. Most communication techniques are hard core skills and other communication mechanisms revolve around the leaders actions, behaviors and how they utilize those communication techniques with others. One action utilized with others is to have the ability to describe what matters most to themselves and to the success of their team.

It is easy to let the day to day interactions and distractions take over the leaders line of thought. However true leaders must understand that they must always be focused on what matters most and be able to quickly describe that focus when called upon to do so. This vital piece needs to be a part of any leaders skill set and and it needs to be up to date.

What I am describing is an elevator speech. How often have you been asked by your boss something simple like "how are things going?" This is a perfect opportunity and if you are not properly prepared you can be caught off guard and squander your chances.A two minute prepared speech effectively communicating  the things that matter most to you and to the success of your team will enlist support, help, appreciation and confidence in you that will go along way towards your success as a leader.    

The Essence of Leadership

If you are looking for a shot in the arm for your leadership team. Play this at your next staff meeting to help get your point across. Enjoy!

http://www.theleadershipmovie.com/?cm_mmc=CheetahMail-_FR-_-07.06.12-_-TEOLmovie&utm_source=CheetahMail&utm_camp

Alignment

To be an exemplary leader one must have the ability to align their actions and behaviors with the organizational business objectives. Top leaders must realize that their teams are always watching them and whether they want to be or think they are or not, they are definitely role models. Having said that, successful leaders must walk their talk otherwise inconsistencies occur and a muddled corporate culture with mixed corporate objectives end up being the result.

Here are a few of the dozen or so questions to ask yourself or of your managers to check to see if you and your managers are in alignment with your organizational culture and or organizational objectives:

Has anyone in your organization up line or down told you or described you to others as a good corporate role model?
Has anyone pointed out consistencies or inconsistencies in your executive or management behaviors and ANY corporate business objectives?
Has anyone ever told you that you are not doing what you tell others to do?
Does your HR department assume any role or responsibility in recognizing the need for and making recommendations that would help managers and senior leaders to better align employee strengths and skills with corporate business objectives.  

Once an assessment is complete the key question is what are you willing to do to make improvements in corporate alignment and how will you know if you have been successful.

Do you or someone on your leadership team display negative or non constructive leadership actions and behaviors?

We all have had our moments where we have done or said something that we wish we could take back. I am not talking about these types of situations. I am talking about CONSISTENT  negative or non constructive leadership actions or behaviors that reduce your ability to build relationships within a team. These actions  and behaviors also derail a leaders opportunities to advance in the organization. To be more specific I am referring to:

  

_  Stressed out                  

-  Talks too much

_ Use of strong, inappropriate words

_ Demanding

_ Overly-directive

_ Controlling

_ Lashes out at others

_ Over-burdened

_ Over-whelmed

_ Avoids others

_ Too quiet

_ Pulls back

_ Shuts down
-  Defensive


Ask yourself the following set of questions and ask yourself how will you know if you have made improvements in your leadership actions and behaviors and in demonstrating a more specific positive leadership presence.  Then rate yourself on your overall responses on a scale of 1 to 10. Keep this rating handy when you revisit this topic in another 90 days. Also When you review this topic months later you will have a reference point to work from for any adjustments.


DO YOU model the exemplary and constructive behaviors you want
others to use?
ARE YOU open to engaging in discussion with your team about your
own behaviors?
Does your team see you acting over-burdened and over-whelmed?
____ If so, do you reach out to your team during those times? _____ Do
you reach out in a positive and constructive way? ____ How do you do
this?
Have you and your team ever practiced having difficult conversations
about issues you are currently dealing with or issues you know to be
forthcoming?
Do you show calm mannerisms? _____ Do you sense that your team
needs more security and comfort? _______ What makes you think
that?
Do you believe that yelling and screaming are NOT good management
techniques?
Do you believe that barking out commands does not demonstrate a
positive leadership presence?
Do you believe that development of team members is an important
positive leadership skill?

What is praise?

Praise is positive feedback, a genuine positive statement that is given sincerely and is a true statement. Successful leaders celebrate the simple and small things and from that their team follows through on big accomplishments. Unfortunately it is not done enough in most cases. Have you ever come home and said man! they just give me too much praise at work! Or have you ever heard someone over lunch or out with friends and hear those words? No I didn't think so.

We are usually conditioned to look for the problem and issues and yes we have to do that as part of process control and so forth. However those are management issues and giving praise is a leadership behavior and action.

Ask yourself how many times this week did you catch someone doing something right...and let them know you noticed. Also how can you and your team become even better at giving praise and spreading that habit of giving well deserved praise through out the organization. Imagine the implications this can make on your team and your workplace for that mater.    

Make it happen!

I am always telling my team to "make it happen". Now I have found a video to go with it. This was pretty cool so I thought I would share.
Enjoy!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=cITNveY-kig

Make it happen!

Are you the most effective leader you can be?

In order to be an effective leader there is a long list of soft core skills such as, approachable, caring, cooperative, influential and hard core skills such as the ability to move things forward, business acumen and focusing on what matters. Additionally there are people skills to consider as well. A few examples of people skills is a leader who asks for help, asks for others opinions and asks insightful and important questions. Now by no means is this a complete list and in fact we could spend a significant amount of time adding to each category.

Where I am going with this is that almost all of the soft cores, hard core and people skills can be learned. Certainly for some leaders it may take a fair amount of practice to perfect. Even then once you have honed your skills to the best of your ability, to be an exemplary leader with a distinct advantage over other leaders in and outside of your industry, you must have the ability to take your strengths and combine them with the strengths of your team.

So here is my challenge to you. Make a list of your team members and mark a star besides those who are contributing the most. Then write out beside each person's name what they are best at doing. Now ask your self are you getting the most out of each person's strengths and how can you better emphasize each person's  strengths. Lastly ask yourself how will you know if you have made improvements in emphasizing your teams strengths and write it down. This is something you should come back every 90 to 100 days and take an assessment and see if you have moved the needle in the right direction.

4 easy steps to problem solving

Often times we run into a problem and it gets us "stuck" and we can't seem to move on while we have this issue staring us in the face. Typically we take side tracks around the problem which often takes off into dead end situations or worse we don't do anything until the problem blows up into a major problem of some sort. 

Here are 4 easy steps to take to help avoid those dead ends or blow ups and help push through your problem and on to your original path to success.

Step 1:  See the positive(s) in the problem 

Lets face it, most of the time when we see a problem, we rarely get excited about the opportunity it presents and we usually spend our time and attention being in a negative frame of mind about it. With that in mind, how successful will you be in solving the problem with that mind set?  Yes not very successful! So 
when presented with a problem seek out the positive(s) and put yourself in a positive mind frame.

Step 2: Identify The Gap

Ask yourself what is it that you are attempting to achieve prior to the problem. Usually we focus on what is wrong rather than what it is we want to accomplish.When you see what it is you want to accomplish and or the positive outcome you will be able to see the problem as an opportunity to get a positive result.

Step 3: Create a Plan

Now that you are in a positive mind set, the biggest and most important thing we can do is TAKE ACTION. In doing so you will want to create an action plan. You will need to ask yourself some tough questions and in some cases you may need to change your perception.

Step 4: Enjoy The Process

This is where the magic happens! When you have laid out a well thought out plan, begin to TAKE ACTION and enjoy the process, the problem ceases to exist. The problem that was a negative cloud that had us going down a dead end or fearing that it was going to blow up at any moment paralyzing us in our tracks is gone and you can move on to the next thing on the road to success.

I love this quote!

Don't let your learning lead to knowledge; let your learning lead to action. - Jim Rohn

I cant tell you how many times I have told many people in sessions that I have facilitated "please do not leave my session and let the workbook/binder I gave you sit on a bookshelf our get stuck under your car seat or in-between the cushions of your couch. Hang onto them and refer back to them" In fact in some sessions we have filled out action plans in those workbooks. However what do you think probably happened in almost all cases? Think back to any of your most recent training classes or a leadership book you have read and what has happened? Exactly!

So what if I told you to take the top three things you learned today and immediately write out an action to take on each of those three things. And what if I told you to put those things into action your first day back at the office How powerful would that be for you? 

Now before you exit out of this page. Think of something you learned recently. It can be anything, it could even be this very concept and write down one action you are going to take and do it right now......

Nice job! Keep it up you are well on you way! 

Forget Networking. How to Be a Connector

Interesting article from LinkedIn

 

Forget Networking. How to Be a Connector

BY Alina Tugend | January 29, 2012|

238

Photo courtesy of Josh Bycel

Connector Josh Bycel raised $50,000 in three weeks to fund a medical clinic at a refugee camp in Darfur.

inShare6,170

We all know people like them, people who seem to know everyone. They're always able to help -- or if they can't, they know someone who can. You meet them for the first time and in 15 minutes, you're talking with them like you're childhood friends. They're successful, smart and funny, with a likable touch of self-deprecation. And they're interested in everything.
Who are they? Connectors. Take Maryam Banikarim, senior vice president and chief marketing officer at Gannett, publisher of USA Today. She has a perfect job for a connector -- she helps link Gannett's various newspapers and media outlets "and bring the pieces together."
"I like people and am genuinely curious," says Banikarim, 42. "I like stories and want to make connections. But I didn't know the word for it until my husband read Malcolm Gladwell's The Tipping Point and said, 'I finally have a word for you -- a connector.' "
Related: 12 Tips for Trading Places in 2012
As Gladwell writes, "sprinkled among every walk of life . . . are a handful of people with a truly extraordinary knack of making friends and acquaintances. They are Connectors." Gladwell describes them as having an ability to span many different worlds, subcultures and niches.

Traits such as energy, insatiable curiosity and a willingness to take chances seem to be the common thread among connectors -- as well as an insistence that connecting is not the same as networking.
"Networking I see as a means to an end," says Jill Leiderman, executive producer of the late-night show Jimmy Kimmel Live. But connecting, she explains, is about using a genuine love of meeting people and making friends to engage and assist one another.
Related: Top Workplace Trend for 2012
Connectors show a willingness to venture outside their comfort zones. For example, comedy writer Josh Bycel (shown top) visited a Darfur refugee camp six years ago, and on the way home he came up with the idea of raising money for a medical clinic for the camp. In three weeks, he had collected $50,000.
That idea grew into a nonprofit called OneKid OneWorld, which aims to connect schools in the United States with those in Kenya and other developing countries to provide everything from books to clean water.
"I'm a comedy writer. I don't know anything about building schools," says Bycel, 40, who lives in Los Angeles. "But I'm interested in learning. You need to get out and make connections outside of your own world. Being interested in lots of different things by definition allows you to be a connector."
The willingness to reach out to someone you don't know is crucial to the art of connecting, and especially important in uncertain economic times. Those who are in mid-career and may have worked for one company for years should learn connecting skills before they need them.
For instance, most people's natural inclination is to seek out friends at meetings and mealtimes. Banikarim says not to do that. "It's easy to sit with someone you know," she says. "It's hard, but more interesting, to sit with someone you don't know. This is not like high school. It's not just the losers who don't have somewhere to sit."
It may seem as if connectors are born, not made, but that's not necessarily true. Banikarim was forced to learn to reach out to people from an early age. She moved with her family from Iran to Paris in 1979, then to Northern California, where there wasn't an Iranian community. "I was often that new kid," she says. When she started college at Barnard, "I knew it was either sink or swim. The first week of school, I joined every club and went to every meeting. I ended up as freshman class president."
Joining clubs and organizations is a terrific way to find like-minded people, but only go when you have an interest -- and don't attend endless networking get-togethers. Keith Ferrazzi, author of Never Eat Alone, says he has never been to an official networking event. Instead, he advises, join organizations that focus on the events and activities you love.
Related: Best Second Act Reinvention 2011: E-book Author John Locke
"I have a friend who is the executive vice president of a large bank in Charlotte," he writes in his book. "His networking hotspot is, of all places, the YMCA. He tells me that at 5 and 6 in the morning, the place is buzzing with exercise fanatics like himself getting in a workout before they go to the office. He scouts the place for entrepreneurs, current customers and prospects."
Of course, when you're walking into that first meeting or class and facing a bunch of strangers, the instinct is to flee. That's all right. The point is not to ignore the fear, but acknowledge it -- and then work through it.
"I sort of just run into fear, as I run into chaos," says Banikarim, whom The New York Post named one of the 50 most powerful women in New York City in 2008 when she worked at Univision. "You breathe deep, and you have to remember that everyone is scared."
Perhaps one of the most important attributes of a connector is a willingness to help and to reach out even if there is no obvious or immediate payback.
That means thinking long-term. Jen Singer is the founder of the blog Mommasaid.net, author of five books, a Pull-Ups spokeswoman and an undeniable connector. "The biggest mistake people make is they think 'if I help this person, that will happen immediately.' We have to stop thinking in linear terms," she says.
Helping others out doesn't mean you can't hold some things back. Singer, 44, uses the word "coopetition" -- a combination of competition and cooperation -- to describe her philosophy. "I think this generation understands you share, but also protect your own interests -- you don't give a key to everything you have. It's a line you have to learn to walk."
Finally, a connector also occasionally has to disconnect. Leiderman says her boyfriend "has taken away my Blackberry so I can super-connect with him."
Related: Your 2012 Job Hunt Checklist and 5 Traits of Successful Freelancers
This originally appeared at SecondAct.com.

Something new I learned last week

I recently reconnected with a woman who is an entrepreneur who offers consulting to wardrobe stylists across the country and retailers. She has a couple of web businesses that caught my eye on Facebook and I remembered her from a golf tournament I created many years ago. We met over coffee to catch up and at the end of it she asked if I would be interested in participating in a mastermind goal setting session. I told her that I had already written out my goals for the year but I was intrigued to hear what it entailed.

My friend told me that there are times when we may need some support from other people to help us in facing difficult situations during the goal setting process. She finds that it is helpful to have some “male” energy present during this process. With that said, in doing some research I have read that mastermind goal setting has been known to have helped a lot of people in achieving their goals.

In short mastermind principles involves a lot of brainstorming during a few meeting sessions with one or two other people (or more for that matter) can be very helpful to someone who could use an unbiased opinion when starting a new business or career transition just to name a couple of examples. One other plus in engaging in this format you get ongoing support because your new mastermind “team” will be involved with hearing your thoughts/pain and hold you accountable to the goal setting process.

Needless to say we are meeting next week.

Want help focusing on what really matters? Ask yourself these on a daily basis.

An article by Geoffrey James on LinkedIn:



Think that success means making lots of money?  Think again.
Pictures of dead presidents have never made anybody happy. And how can you be successful if you're not happy? And buying things with all that money isn't much better. A new car, for instance, might tickle your fancy for a day or two–but pride of ownership is temporary.
Real success comes from the quality of your relationships and the emotions that you experience each day. That's where these 10 questions come in.
Ask them at the end of each day and I absolutely guarantee that you'll become more successful. Here they are:
1. Have I made certain that those I love feel loved?
2. Have I done something today that improved the world?
3. Have I conditioned my body to be more strong flexible and resilient?
4. Have I reviewed and honed my plans for the future?
5. Have I acted in private with the same integrity I exhibit in public?
6. Have I avoided unkind words and deeds?
7. Have I accomplished something worthwhile?
8. Have I helped someone less fortunate?
9. Have I collected some wonderful memories?
10. Have I felt grateful for the incredible gift of being alive?
Here's the thing.  The questions you ask yourself on a daily basis determine your focus, and your focus determines your results.
These questions force you to focus on what's really important. Take heed of them and the rest of your life—especially your work—will quickly fall into place.

Follow up to behavior modification

Many of you have asked a few questions about my post on behavior modification so here are a few points to remember.



Step Two - Strategy
Turning lofty ambitions into consistent action.
OK so I know what my vision is...now what? How do I build my strategy?

You need to write down your goals. In writing your goals you may have heard of creating SMART goals. Specific, Measurable, Achievable Realistic/Relevant and Time bound. In my pursuit of adding personal training to my tool belt I have come across something called SCAMPI goals which are as follows;

Specific - There are countless studies that show specific, challenging goals return better performance than easy goals, no goals or just giving it your best shot. In writing your goals be very specific. If it is working out that you said you were going to do in 2012 write down how many workouts per week. If it is to lose weight write down how many pounds and what your body fat percentage is you want to be at.

Challenging - people who set Challenging goals are more apt to achieve more than the people who set modest ones. Start your goals at the far end of your abilities which should inspire more of an effort on your part and will bolster your confidence when you achieve that goal.

Approach - Your goals should concentrate on the desired ends to move toward, instead of the negative things to avoid. Avoidance goals bring up memories of setbacks and or failures. People that use this approach with a lot of avoidance goals are not as happy and less motivated than those who continue to work towards the ultimate goal.

Measurable - Measuring your progress towards your goals allows you to determine whether your plan is working.   Quantifiable goals illustrates continual progress by minimizing the tendency to look at success in an all or nothing point of view. Which also has a tendency to lead minor setbacks build into a relapse.

Proximal - This is where the magic happens. Along with your long terms vision also put in near term, proximal goals. These near term goals take you to an enhanced performance level and improves your confidence and determination. For example when I planned to complete my SPHR re-certification (60 hours) , I set up a proximal goal to complete 20 hours of credit each year and broke that down into another goal to achieve 10 hours every six months.

Inspirational - This is another opportunity for the magic to happen.Ensure that your goals are inspiring in the sense that they are in alignment with your own ambitions. You will strive towards those inspiring goals with more interest and confidence leading to improved performance and persistence.

Step Three - Belief
Minimizing fear, uncertainty and doubt.

Here are three tips to foster your belief in achieving your goals.

Use small steps first - Start with modest goals and build them up in small increments.Goals should be just at the tip of your reach yet attainable.

Picture it in your mind - High achievers routinely visualize what they expect to accomplish. Research has shown that mental practice works. Visualize every specific part of your SCAMPI goals in vivid and specific detail often and you will achieve success.

Schedule Negativity - If you are one who has self doubt sabotage your efforts on a regular basis. Try setting aside a small window of time say only 30 minutes at just one point of the day. Another variation of this is to limiting that negativity to a specific location. There is research out there that has shown that anxiety can be lessened if it is kept to 30 minutes a day. If these are to "New Age" for you something that I do often is to "wait to worry" if it hasn't happened yet and or if there is something that I can do to avoid what ever the worrying thing is, I chose to wait to worry about it until it truly does happen. Most of the time the "what if this happens" never does yet you wound up spending a whole lot of time worrying for nothing. So next time wait to worry and in the meantime focus on the positive things.

Step Four - Persistence
Drive and determination

How do I stay the course?

Successful people work hard and overcome adversity. They persist. Here are three tips to help in your endeavor:

Reward your success - When you achieve one of your proximal goals celebrate it. In training my girlfriend when she hit her first milestone we went shoe shopping together. She got to spend time with me while pursuing her long time hobby of finding that perfect pair of shoes.

Create a circle of excellence - Ask for support from your family and friends. Create a circle of people who are knowledgeable about the goals you are achieving and or who are striving towards the same goals. In my pursuit of learning how to salsa dance in addition to taking lessons I went on line and found a meet up group and now I have a large number of new friends who also enjoy the pursuit of salsa dancing. 

Have a plan for setbacks - you should always expect to accomplish your goals and in the same vein you should prepare for setbacks. A simple plan is to have a designated person from your circle of excellence that you know you can trust so that when you do slip you can call in speak with this person to help get you back on track. Another idea is to have a reminder card set aside with inspiring messages to refer to. I have an entire dream board that I put together with various quotes and pictures as symbols of what I am striving for.

Follow these tips and you should be in for a very successful year!